The Only Difference Between Mats Sundin and a Furby is Ten Million Dollars

We all remember one of the latest toy sensations from the 1990′s known affectionately as a Furby. It was the cute, cuddly, animatronic toy that everyone wanted, no natter who you were. Your best friend was lucky enough to buy one and when you saw it you thought to yourself, “Man, I have to get me one of those.” So you ran home and as soon as you could get the words out of your mouth, you asked your parents for one. Because your parents had sense they told you to save up the money on your own, and as a ten year old that was like a death sentence.

You saved up that monthly allowance, or weekly if you were lucky until you had the $35 it took to buy you a Furby. You weren’t alone because everyone else wanted one. Then the glorious day came when you finally saved up enough money. You got home from school and begged your mom to take you there. She tried to convince you to save your money for something else but you didn’t want to hear anyone of it. An hour later you were pulling into the parking lot of Toys R Us and got out of the car and ran to the door leaving your mom in the dust.

You got to the Furby aisle and there they were, by the thousand, each waiting a loving child to grab it and take it home and care for it. You saw the color you liked and you grabbed it, walked up to the counter and proudly slammed the $35 it took you three months to save, and made your purchase. As mom drove home you yelled to drive faster and she rolled her eyes. And then there you were, at home with your Furby. You went up to your room, took it out of the box, placed the four Double A batteries in it and put it on your bed, only to discover that all it did was speak a language you didn’t understand (Furbish) and blink. So you sat there, for hours waiting for it to do something and nothing happened. A week later you threw it against the wall. A month later you threw it in the garbage can.

Yes thats right my friends, I just compared Mats Sundin to a Furby. I fully expect some angry Canadians to be demanding my head shortly, but I think I can handle it. The entire hockey world waited for his decision, month after month teams planned on how they would afford him. The Canucks being the most eager kept their two year/twenty million dollar deal on the table (prorated, of course). They held out hoping that lucky #13 would sign with them. Then the day finally came.

Now eight games into the Sundin saga, the Canucks have won only once. Sundin has two goals and an assist while demonstrating how tough it is to go all those months without playing, only to step onto the ice for an NHL game. His skating has been slow, his head hasn’t been there. It seems the only difference between Mats Sundin and a Furby is the ten million dollars, tax not included.

Posted by The Hockey Writers on Jan 30 2009. Filed under Humor, Northwest, Vancouver Canucks, Western Conference. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.