The Predators Almanac for Winter/Spring 2010

 

While fans of some teams would be panicking if their boys had the kind of streak Nashville has had for the last couple of weeks, those of us who have followed the Predators since 1998 know it’s just the circle of life and there are good things to come once the Olympics are over.

For the uninitiated, here is an almanac to help you keep your bearings until the playoffs:

February:

Canadians will ask who that Weber boy is and where he plays.

Wade Belak with punch someone.

Barry Trotz will send a message by shipping off a player or two to Milwaukee. They will text back to Nashville that the people are nice, the girls are pretty and the beer is better than expected and the unmarried players will start plotting to get sent to the Land of Cheddar and Hops. Memos will begin circulating at the PFO about the possibility of moving the farm team to Juneau.

Someone at the Tennessean will be pulled from the classified desk to cover a game.

Wade Belak will punch someone.

Someone will start a rumor that Radulov is coming back.

March:

Wade Belak with punch someone.

Pekka Rinne will spend some quiet time for pimp slapping a Red Wing for screening, a referee, most of the coaching staff, whoever should have been helping him, and a random fan who kept screaming, “We suck! We can do better!” As he is dragged down the tunnel, skates carving a groove into the floor, he can be heard ranting, “me me Mikä on nyt kuluva ” me ” te läksytys läksytys jokseenkin? It’s WE rikki paikalla kesken säkkipilli!” Dan Ellis will watch quietly from the side and then mutter, “Dude…” as he flips down the cage of his helmet.

The veins on the sides of Jason Arnott’s neck will make a reappearance as he has to remind everyone that a hockey game is sixty minutes long and Milwaukee is just a short bus ride away.

Wade Belak will punch someone.

April:

Wade Belak with punch someone.

Nashville fans with friends in Philadelphia and San Jose will weary of being drunk-dialed or texted “Thank you” messages.

Wade Belak will punch someone.

Radulov will see David Poile scouting in Europe, lift his sweater and make kissy faces at Poile while pressing his bare chest to the glass.

Ryan Jones will begin to grow his hair out.

Jordin Tootoo will make plans to go home because he misses the taste of game that hasn’t been tainted by the TVA.

David Poile will start scanning the prospect lists for anyone named Ryan. He will also scope out Scotties and Gregs since Nashville is now clean out of players with those names.

Jas Faulkner
Jas Faulkner is a minimally socialised writer and artist who lives and works in Nashville, Tennessee. She hearts her attitude problem.
Jas Faulkner

2 Comments

  1. Great read, Jas! I needed to laugh!

  2. Great stuff, as usual!

Subscribe to our mailing list

* indicates required Email Address * Name Email Format html text mobile