Ryan Getzlaf to Have Appendectomy

It seems Bruce Boudreau and the Anaheim Ducks are not ambiturners, because nothing will go right.

Tied for last in the Western Conference with a record of 1-5-2 and just six goals through eight games (only one team in NHL history has scored fewer goals in their first eight games), the team has lost captain Ryan Getzlaf for 4-12 days due to appendicitis, the team announced Tuesday night.

With the team about to face the Dallas Stars that same night, the center has returned to Anaheim to have a non-emergency appendectomy. The announcement said that Getzlaf has “had discomfort intermittently over the last six weeks,” which maybe helps give a reason for one of their top three paid players, all of whom have just a single point this season.

The only possible explanation for all of the terrible things that are happening to the Ducks is that Bob Murray hit a gypsy with his car over the summer.

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